Thursday, October 20, 2011

Mr. Tayto for President

A notable absentee from the current Presidential election is Mr. Tayto, who has participated in a number of General Election campaigns in the past.

It is rumoured that he will be a write-in candidate and his Election Bus was spotted earlier today on Dublin's Northside just before starting its countrywide tour.

Features to note are the aspirational twin exhausts pointing skywards. The right hand back door given over to sponsorship in deference to our likely future paymasters. The subtle racial reference to Lyons Tea in the trouser legs - Tayto is a thirsty consumption. Retention of the boater in honour of James Joyce. The red jacket lest Mary Davis get all the limelight. The blue tie to avoid any impression of power dressing. And the customary big smile as an alternative to kissing babies.

So don't forget the write-in candidate on the 27th.


Anonymous said...

Excellent candidat. Au moins celui-là, il aura la patate ! Cette campagne est d'un très haut niveau. Une saison politique de qualité. L'Irlande va vers les sommets. Même s'il sont loin...

Dáithaí C said...

An obvious front runner with his cheesy (and onion) smile. Let's hope no old convictions for a salt and vinegar come out of the woodwork. All in all, Mr. Tayto is quite the packet for Prez!

Viv said...

Mr Tayto is an old salt with origins on Dublin's northside.

He has the ability to alter the flavour of his message to suit all voters. He could win if he is well-packaged.

Póló said...


Yes, but his father, Mr Murphy, lived on the southside, Laragh, Killiney Avenue.

Anonymous said...

A cross border candidate - one foot in Santry (?) and the other in Tandragee (Tayto castle, deep in the Ulster countryside).
Given me much pleasure over the years.
Best in the world (the northern cheese and onion).
But I'm not so sure about those aspirational exhausts. Might they be a nod to Martin McGuinness. In other words - are they really exhausts?